Dear Diary

Week 32

Baby’s Length: 11.75 to 19 in.

Baby’s Weight: 4 lbs.

Baby’s Size: Ken Doll

Dear Diary,

I am getting a little sick and tired of the inaccurate “baby size” comparisons of I mean, c’mon! A Ken doll?

I’m a little frustrated with pregnancy this week. (Can you tell??)

I’m tired all the time. I don’t feel like getting up and moving around and when I finally do, the baby kicks me so hard in the bladder, I cry. Sometimes, I think she’s on a mission to kill my lady parts and render them unusable. Perhaps she doesn’t want siblings?

I feel fat and bloated and can’t stand how swollen my face looks. I’ve grown out of most of maternity clothes which absolutely disgusts me to no end. “Oh yes, but think of the prize you get in the end!” you can argue. But it just seems like there has to be a more humane way of having a child. Carrying it for 9 months in your abdomen seems almost barbaric. Our technology has progressed in so many other areas, yet we must still grow babies like animals. Seems so strange now that I think about it.

Sometimes I feel like a machine and that my only purpose right now is to grow this child. Sweet, yes, but still frustrating not having my body to myself. It’s already annoying to have to share it with my husband, but now a baby too?! I don’t like not belonging to myself anymore. I don’t remember agreeing to do this much sharing….

Don’t get my wrong, I love being pregnant. It’s an amazing thing! However, I can’t wait to get this kid out of me so that my body can go back to a somewhat normal state. I’m tired of looking (and feeling) like I could be a body double for the Pillsbury Doughboy.

I am also tired of eating for two. I feel like all I do is eat, eat, eat. Nothing tastes good to me and I can never satisfy my cravings. It’s like there is no restaurant in the world that has something on the menu that I want to eat. SO many choices, but I don’t really know what I want. I just know that what I want is never on the menu or in the grocery store. It’s like I live in the wrong country or something…

“So this is all totally normal,” I convince myself. My due date is more like a relief date. For some reason, I think I can handle the lack of sleep better than all these other… complaints.

Dear Diary,

I’m on week 32 now with less than 8 weeks to go. Seems like just yesterday I got pregnant! How time flies…